Yes, crises continues in our home: A boy locked inside his room. A boy choosing not to connect.
But what a big God we have. He is not asking me to do anything that He hasn’t done Himself. I am to love a boy who’s really not that lovable (you know what I mean right?). He is asking me to connect with someone who does not want to connect with me. He is asking me to love on a boy who tramples on my heart. Being ignored hurts deeply (at least in my case.)
To love when it’s thrown back in your face is painful, and yet, that is what God is calling me to. But only because He knows it can be done!
I am rising above myself. It is powerful. It is an honor. It is also painful. There is hardship: My body is full of stress. My nights lack peaceful sleep. And I depend on God, because I am selfish.
It is my opinion we are selfish. I think we tend to focus on the self: What can I get? How can I feel good? But we are called to rise above ourselves, which can only be done through God ~ the source.
We are called to something beautiful, painful, but beautiful !
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Oh,Maddy, I am so sorry for you guys. Parenting is so hard in these days, but much more when you are also dealing with others who messed up their job as a parent. Prayers for you today.
What I see mostly today is what God is going in it all. We are blessed that He calls us to this. Still we sail on your faithful prayers. Thanks mom!!
Maddy if anyone can break through a thick shelled individual it is you! You are the chisle and God is your hammer! This boy needs to know you will love him no matter how horrible he gets. He expects you to abandon him. I would be more worried if he wasn’t challenging you. But he will know you soon enough. With every challenging ball this child throws comes an opportunity to teach and to love and to grow yourself. Just know that you are loved and valued by many!
I love what you say about the chisel and hammer!! And you are right on the mark with everything… in the end it is good he is testing us like this. We just never knew it would happen so very quickly. But in the end yes, it needs to happen! We have hope God will redeem this boy’s hurts.
Maddy, you are a neighbor at the Beloved Brew and this is my first time here. You are right that God is with you and will walk with you through all and any of what you are dealing with. I am so grateful that He wants to walk besides us in the tough moments as well as the beautiful or easy moments. He is our Strength, our Refuge, our Rock.
As a sister in Christ, I want you to know that I lift you in prayer as well as the boys. They need Him so.
Caring through Christ, ~ linda
Maddy, I’m glad that you write out your struggles. I wonder how many others struggle quietly and just do not own the battle. Thank-you (& Tim) for bravely shouldering responsibility and loving concretely. May you know our Lord’s comfort …and occasional victories…until the day the boy man-ishly embraces you both expresses his gratitude. Until then – know that many of us recognize that you are modeling Christ …who laid down His life …on his own accord. That wasn’t pretty…but oh the benefits! Jay (& Beth)
Thank you for beautiful words Jay!! About an hour ago we had a major victory already. How God is showing us that what we do and what it costs us is worth everything!!