Being a woman

photo 5I tell my friends that a few months ago, I became a woman. It’s a funny story really…

I have my reasons… but I never viewed myself as a typical woman. I didn’t want to be a typical woman. I think it’s the sexual abuse in my life that caused me to want to be viewed as strong, independent and definitely not feminine. I always connected better with man than with women. Women could be so difficult. So when Tim called me a ‘typical woman’ during a skype call when we were long distant dating I grabbed a blanket, put it over me and was like: “No, no, no.” I felt so embarrassed. And I was mad. I am not a typical woman! And yet… I knew he was right. And I knew it was time to embrace the fact that really I am a typical woman: a woman who has PMS (badly), who needs a man, who is difficult at times, and who needs girly time with girlfriends.

And just a few months ago I realized I like women things. I like to do things many women like. Read: things that men do not understand, won’t be good at and have no interest in. Sewing!! I picked up sewing!! And I have to be honest, I am a little embarrassed about it. I have to get over this ‘thing’ of not wanting to be womanlike. And so, here I am, spreading the word that really, I am no different than most women, I am one, and I like sowing. I used to view it as boring, I laughed at people who knit and the latest trent crochet, I simply did not understand. But not anymore. I understand now.

My mother in law got me a sewing machine for my birthday this past summer. I jumped for joy even though I had never sat behind one or ever desired to sit behind one. For some reason I was instantly excited. And when I had some empty time coming up in December I knew how to fill that time automatically. I would sew with mom. I knew I wanted to make something very special and since my nieces first birthday was coming up that would be my project: a blanket for Aileena.  Mom thought it was a pretty big project as a first project but she let me have it anyways.

I had a blast that day. There is lots to learn (mostly about patience) but I am hooked!! What surprised me is that my mind was empty. I never have an empty mind and this was an awesome find. I can sew and not think about anything!! Wonderful! There are times that I just long to sew, there’s this deep desire. Work schedule is getting in the way for now but soon, very soon… I already have an order for a nursery pillow and matching curtain. I can’t wait…

Thanks to mom who taught me to sew! Who taught me what it is like to be a woman 😉  I am convinced every mother should teach her daughter to sow (and allow her to call in the way hours of the night when she runs into a problem with her sewing machine, again).

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12 comments on “Being a woman

  1. Sara

    I just love everything about this post!!!

    1. MaddyChristine Hope Brokopp

      Thanks friend. Applause for me right? 😉
      Love seeing you here!!

    2. Faith (mom) Brokopp

      AWwww,Maddy, that is such a nice blog and commendation to me. I am so pleased that you enjoy my hobby!–that was the longest time that we have spent together–just you and I. And you persevered to the end and finished the project–that was so great. I hope that Alaina will always cherish her quilt! Love you, Maddy, and hope we can do another project sometime!–Mom

      1. MaddyChristine Hope Brokopp

        Well mom, by the looks of Steve’s comment… we have our new project 😉
        Besides, Melissa put in orders. And I want to make us a summer quilt, all white of course. Lets set a date? (Or a few)
        I love you.

  2. Gretchen

    Dear Maddy, your blog has my heart in a giggle! I dream of sowing with friends. I get terribly frustrated by the rules of sowing which probably means I don’t understand them. Anyway, I just wished to comment. You know it’s funny, Adam wishes to sow.

    1. MaddyChristine Hope Brokopp

      I don’t know of any sowing rules 😉
      I just sow!
      And I should have a sowing date with Adam, for sure.

  3. Steve

    Great work on the blanket! Can I place an order for mine? Blessings to you and Tim.

  4. Cheryl Wallace

    Sewing can make you feel do accomplished. Especially when you finish the project. I learned to sew when my Beth was small, and made a lot of her dresses. She was so proud in them.
    Have fun!!!
    Love you.
    Cheryl Wallace

    1. MaddyChristine Hope Brokopp

      Oh yes, I can get into clothes making!! I have many ideas, no clue how to do it yet… Maybe a sowing date with you too Cheryl!!

  5. Vicky

    I read this earlier in the week and am finally able to come and tell you how pretty your quilt is! I cannot believe that is your first one. Your niece will have that to treasure for years. I have to tell you I am not a sewer either, and my Mother-in-law used to try and teach me and I just never wanted to learn. I am so glad you discovered a new love and can’t wait to see what the next big project is! Hugs sweet one- job well done!

  6. Pingback: Quilt number two | As for me, I will always have Hope