Often people ask me how I will serve Tim in his ministry life– in what way will I come along side him? I have been asked the same question when it comes to our church life– in what way do we desire to serve?
Tim and I are both servants. We love to help out and do things for other people. We have no lack there. When we became members in our church we were given a list of places to serve and I felt like taking them all on.
But I am in no rush. I realize I have gone through many changes over the past 12 months and I am still processing this. I need time. I love the States and it’s the place to be for me, but after having been in Holland for years and rebuilding life there, it’s quite the adjustment to live here again. I need time. Married life is beautiful, I am loving life, but at the same time this too is a major adjustment. I need time.
Tim and I were very intentional about getting people involved during our dating season and engagement. We wanted people to come alongside us and have a deep look at who we are, what we were doing and where we were going. People who knew us well. We loved doing our marriage counseling both in Holland and in the States— we couldn’t get enough input. We both want to build something healthy, strong and fun. A firm foundation is important to us. And building that foundation is not something that is built in that premarital season alone. In that dating season you work through things, and you talk about what you want married life to look like, but it isn’t until after the vows are taken, that we actually put things into practice. We have been very real about creating healthy patterns in our relating to one another and building our family, but of course old patterns do come to the surface as you truly start doing life together, and for us that was after exchanging our vows on our wedding day. It’s not till you live under one roof that you really get to see someone’s habits and ways. And thus building that healthy and strong foundation is something that is happening now more than ever, and it’s something I want to be really aware of and concentrate on. And that being said, in all these changes this past year, and now working on our foundation, I have not been in a rush to take on anything else.
Of course we talk a lot about Tim’s ministry life and how I fit in. There are times for sure when we work on things together regarding his work. To be honest, I can’t wait to get to Gabon and meet his Gabonese family. I always tell people I know Tim’s work on paper, but I really want to see it ‘live’. We did take a road trip to some of his US church partners in November and that was a great way to see him at work. It got me excited. My hands are aching to get to work. But for now we are limited. I can’t leave the US until my immigration process is completed and for now that won’t be for another 4 months or so. I am not allowed to work just yet– another immigration ‘issue’. And that just fits right into us being able to build that foundation we desire. I love that I have this time to just be and adjust. I love that Tim is in no rush and gives me all this time.
And I am not worried. With our personalities we will always be on the look out to help others, come alongside those who are in need, acknowledge our neighbors. Just not in a formal role. And I think that is wise, for now.